What are the implications of having a very public life? Especially when people in your life are private people, do I say or do things that jeopardize my relations with others. I always believed that my blog is pretty PG, safe for the masses and those involved in my life. I know over the years I have voiced my opinion very much so on things only to insert foot in mouth shortly after. I am not a perfect person and I always tend to say exactly what I am thinking at any particular moment in time. I can say that I have upset people but that is never my intention. My intention is to create this timeline of my life, as a person who does not want children I know I will need my own daily reminder in old age to what my life was like because I may just lack the people to tell my “story” to. The memories and stories are all we have. We are only what people remember about us and within a couple generations no one really remembers anything about us or who we were to those that mattered. I use this blog as my years of journals to remind myself where I started and also to realize that even the 15 year old who religiously wrote daily is not that far off from the 30 year old who maybe understands life much less than I did then. Life gets complicated and when it does I look back at where I have been and try my hardest to not repeat. I almost like this Crystal, this is when I get introspective, this is the Crystal who feels and sometimes it is great to remember that I am human and not some being absent of all emotion. I have so many things to be thankful in my life for right now, the times of feeling bad for myself went away last year and I live each day just happy and maybe in some form of the word blessed. But I don’t think I will ever stop putting my public self out there, the years of blogging has opened communication with so many people, I have been able to meet some amazing individuals here in Worcester through this avenue. I feel safe with words-written, the ones that are said never feel as safe to me.
So really how much is too much to deluge in a public forum?