I Heart Peanut Butter

Sunday night and my body is tired.
I am far to young to be falling apart. Bad Knees, Messed up ankles and Asthma…
So tomorrow was a busy day for the couple that was not going to be busy anymore..
We woke up , relaxed for a bit even though Neil was already pissed that his stock shows were not on and there was more talk of Israel.
So we did our weekly grocery shopping nice and early, then heading to Wachusett Mountain for the 4th annual Chilifest. Sample Chili, watch some crazy people trying there hand at the Chili-Dog Eating contest. They did give them 1 1/2 minutes to complete and the winner ate 6 chili-dogs. Take into account it was in the mid 90′s yesterday…Hot chili and Hot weather. We each sampled about 7 chilis each, some where hot, some were like baked beans with a spice. But all were yummy. We filled up pretty fast on the chili and a couple adult beverages.
Knowing that we were then going hiking to the summit and then searching for the geocache located near the signal tower. We made it up, sweaty and full……But we made it
The way down my ankle we out ( what else is new) so the rest of the walk down was not as fun as it should have been.
We made it home enough time to stop for ice cream at Rota Spring in Sterling, shower, have adult relations and shower again….
Beth had called mid-trail hummmm on the mid-state trail and we made plans for them to arrive at 7pm…Drinks, Crab rangoons and interesting conversation….Always interesting when Mike is already drunk before they arrive. He drinks and he wants to talk politics and we all want to have fun. Beth and I decided picture taking was the way and there was no way to make Mike want to partake in the fun of stripping and picture taking…..Well Beth will need to come over alone and have some fun with pics with me and Neil.
A few too many pills that help the depressed and drinks and the night was good. They left around 11 something, Neil and I still feeling frisky signed onto the cam and tried to find other couples to have fun with. Instead we got horny middle aged men telling me or Neil what they wanted to see. It got old and I got tired. So after crashing in the living room we call it a night…

Today we have ambitions to make it to the gym and so on. Never happened I was in my nighty until close to 1:30 this afternoon, lounging seeing the drugs started to wear off and we taking myself off my sleeping medication has been interesting. But I need to sleep without taking something…My new goal…
We went to get ice cream,went to search for the damn Geocache at the train tunnel we searched for once before, 2nd time we failed…Where the fuck did they put this shit..In the Mud…Lost one of my flip flops in the mud and needed Neil to rescue me…But was able to climb the rocky walls to get out of the swamp….Damn cache…
Home now after walking back to the car from someones back yard that we ended up in……Got home showered and now relaxing….I AM FRIGGEN BEAT.
Tomorrow we are going to the beach……yes naps and have my boy with me all day……1 more week till I am back at work…..

Martha’s Vineyard, July 06

This is where I spend alot of my time in the summer!!!!!

Just walked in the door about 30 minutes ago and the damn computer was acting up. Left this am to do some “Shopping” with Beth. Kind of a chill day. Waste some gas and drive around, baby intow.
Well it is Friday and I have 1 week and 2 days left before I am back at work, reminder of that came in the form of mail today with some great new reads and letter/calendar from the boss lady. She is bored and misses us, no matter how much the women of Scholastic torture her during the busy season, she misses us. So Monday the 7th I am back in the office..
Been only really getting use to being out of work, to the point that 8 hours at home alone isn’t bothering me anymore and now it is time to head back. That is ok I need to make more money, unemployment just does not cut it.
This should be a nice weekend, Neil is taking this coming Monday and next Friday off so we can spend more time together before I go back to work and then NOOOO time off till Christmas time. Tomorrow is the ChiliFest at Wachusett MT. Figure get to the gym nice and early, sity by the pool after a good workout and then head to Wachusett. Eat some chili, watch some idiots try to eat 10 chilidogs in 60 seconds and then get a nice hike in. Maybe do a nice hike and find a Home for ET ( the travelbug we found in Martha’s Vineyard.)
Not sure what is up for Sunday yet, they are saying rain which kinda blows I was thinking of seeing if the boy wants to make it to the camping area near the beach then we can camp overnight and then be at the beach for Monday morning…Yes the beach. After my doctor cleared my mind that the mole on my neck is not cancer I will go diving back into the sun…Well with SPF at least half the time.
Who knows what the weekend will bring?????It will be fun either way…I think

You know when you have 8 million things to do and you do not feel like doing any of them…..
That is me right now. Just got home from the gym and I have 12 days until I am back at work..Gurr the 5 weeks sure went by fast.
This past week has been somewhat uneventful.
I didn’t get that job at Monster, blah blah blah..I think it is because my old manager at Scholastic is now the director of the department I was going for, and as soon as my name was mentioned she said something. She and I did not get along well. I joined Scholastic in her last year of service with the company and she was already GONE by that point. So I will stay as Scholastic until Neil and I move , hopefully I will not have problems finding a job in Phoenix.
This week was good in the sense that Neil and I are almost done getting our finances in check. He has paid down credit card debt, I paid of my credit cards and I am taking a loan against my 401k to pay off anything else of there lumming around. Then we are opening a joint checking account to put MOVING money in. I want out of here so bad.
I see friends and people I went to school with buying houses and I think “DAMN THAT SHOULD BE ME” just not in Massachusetts. I am not willing to settle for the shack of a house we would get here with outdated kitchens and wood paneling.
Went to the doctors this week about the circulation issues they have determined they have no fucking clue what is wrong. They tested for diabetes and b6 defestiony. HUMMMM
So hanging out today, should be cleaning to get the house sparkling so if we have any guest this weekend I am proud of the house. I hate cleaning on days off….
until next time…..

And no there was no party this weekend because Neil and I figured money we need to save and most people are already busy on the fine weekends of the summer. So what did we do we stayed home…All Weekend and it was great.
Thursday night after going to the Jerkus Circus we were both very much tired and Friday was ours to do NOTHING. We went to the Blockbuster down the road and scouted out three movies..
On Friday night we watched “Happy Endings” by Don Roos, see every damn time I have went to the movie store I have picked it up, flipped it over and read the details for the movie. I would say about 13 times. Finally I was like I need to see this so I stop looking at it every time I come here. Well it was a very good choice indeed. The cast to involve Maggie Gyllenhaal ( I had to look that up to the correct spelling) Tom Arnold, Lisa Kudrow, Jason Ritter and many more. I knew it had to be interesting. I am a huge Maggie Gyllenhaal fan, I think the most from “The secretary” but overall I think I have always had this infatuation with her and think that she is the hottest of hot gals… Maybe I just want to be her. So that was Friday night after scoping out some sexy couples on the interwebs to trade pics with and so on…We went to bed, very much tired.
We had decided that we needed a weekend to ourselves. I mean we do spend every weekend together and make it us, but we needed one weekend where we are not on the road by 6am and where we had to be no where but where we where. So this weekend was a stay at home and absorb each other, and that is what we did. We did leave the house on Saturday to go to the gym and play raquetteball and then to see “Clerks 2″ which I have to say was wonderfully funny. I was a huge “Clerks” fan and so many other greats like “Chasing Amy”, “Dogma”, and “Mallrats”. But Clerks 2 had its magic with the fact that besides one song from Alanis Morrisette, all the music on the song was pre 1995 ( say when the first Clerks came out in 94). I found myself dating myself while singing along to “Soul Alysum’s” “Misery”. I mean I am only 26 but I am sure the 18 year olds out there have no idea who Soul Asylum is…….I truly think this movie is not mean for anyone under 25 well of course the first one wasn’t either but who was I to say anything, I was 14 when the first one came out and I was at the movie with Bells on at that time.
Saturday night was followed by a trip the grocery store to pick up something for this weekends yummies. Neil and I thrive on Ralph’s burgers but once we got a grill here and realized we can make even better ones it was on…
Crystal’s Burger D’Luxe ( Pictures of the yummies )
90% Fat Free Hamburger meat Patties( you may substituted this with Veggie or Turkey burger)
Blue Cheese Crumbled
whole wheat bulky rolls
1 Whole Avocado
Lettuce
On the Vine Tomato

So what was done, I stuffed the burgers with crumbled blue cheese….
Neil the Grill Master then cooked them up to juicy perfection….. ( insert your own cute boy)
Then I had everything prepped in time for the burgers completion.
I then took the mayo and did a smear on both sides of the bun, placed lettuce, sliced avocado salt pepper, 1 slices of tomato and then burger.
They were delicious and we both picked out because we thought we were brave and ate two each. I was so sick feeling.
I couldn’t leave it at just burgers because no meal is complete without some type of veggies.
See in my world it is 99.9% veggies and beans. I was a veggie for some 17 years and one day was introduced to beef again and caved. I only eat meat once a week at the most. The rest of the time I live on beans, pasta and veggies..Summer Squash here I come.
So I had got some sliced sweet potatoes in a bag at Trader Joes , I took them with some olive oil, sea salt and peppercorn….They we yummies too
Saturday night ended with cuddling and loving and then sleepy time. We had to put in the new AC because the one in the bedroom started to spit water at me in my sleep. So that was interesting, I work my AC’s, leaving them on from May till September none stop. I mean who wants a hot house, lucky I live with Neil who can take the house being in the mid 60′s at all times.
Sunday- today was the best of lazy days. I am wearing my PJ’s right now at quarter to 10. Guess what I have been wearing them all day…
Today was a stay in bed till 9:30 ( which for me is like a record) read the paper, drink coffee, make lunch and dinner, watch the race and a movie. Watched “ATL” which for a thug movie was good, I like the thug movies where there is always the one who wants to get out, make something of himself. Hum like “Boys in the Hood”but less hardcore. I mean they did rollerskate for god sake. But it was cute it had the rich girl trying to be the ghetto sista….The younger brotha trying to sell drugs to make a dollar and the older brother with the hidden talent but so damn busy worrying about his family that he does not realize it until some girl points it out. But it was cute, yes cute. Who would think anything about the south side of Atlanta would be cute. After the movie I made the most deadly of desserts. I was looking in my weight watchers cookbook and then found something I decided to improvise on.
So they were Cinnamon Buns with a Chocolate-Cherry filling ( made of lowfat chocolate chips, sugar free cherry pie filling and SF Palmers Strawberry spread) And then once baked where covered with chocolate/cherry sauce, cream cheese spread and confectioners sugar. ( Pictures of Yummies)
HEAVEN…….And so not allowed to be made in this house ever again……Walk away from the sweets…
So here I am…..With a new week ahead of me I try to look forward to it since I am off for only 2 more weeks, wow three weeks went by fast. Hit the gym like a good girl and then chill and hang out with my mom, Beth, maybe hit the beach with Mandy. Who knows !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think this is common, the average american out at the races on a Sunday afternoon. Nothing in my life is common and this was about as american and Common as I have seen.

Another busy week…
Another Hot week, but you will not see me complaining
I will take the heat over cold anyday. I love the feel of the sun on me, I love the warmth seeping in..Well until I read the little fact that indoor tanning raises you skin cancer risk by some 55% so then I was thinking about this mole I have on the back of my neck, since it is in the hair line I never think about it. Well I had mom mom check it out last Thursday and she seems to think I need to get it looked at. Damnit
So Tuesday when Mandy and I went to the beach I was putting SPF 30 all day long, people must look at me, being as tan as I am and laugh….Silly girl they think, you have already done the damage why try now not to let all the harmful UV rays into your body. But overall in my adult life I have not tanned nor been in the sun as much as many, in Colorado there was no ocean so you never would lay out to get tanned, you only got color if you are biking, hiking or rock climbing. So I was very very white for many years.
Anywho we headed to Hampton Beach on Tuesday, I always feel so old there and then the two of us sit and compare ourselves to 16 year old…..Why do we do that to ourselves. Mandy has a rocking body, I think ideal if I was her but she only thinks ” 2 years ago I had that girls body” Well I could live on a couple years ago I had Beyonces body….And I will again….
So laying in the 90+ degree heat made the 50 degree water feel like a prize, we got some swimming in, wave jumping and boogy boarding.

yesterday I meet up with Beth after getting Neil’s car all pimped out, I have never seen it as cleaned as it is right now. It took some time to get the dirt out of places and the fact that he use to eat all the time in the car, I say no eating crumbly foods in cars. Drove down to meet Beth and then went to my moms for a bit, the baby is 6 months old and my mom still had not seen her so my mother was taking pictures and all being cute with the baby. Beth and I left to do a little shopping and to see about getting me a summer suit for the next interview. I need to win over on this interview….
Got home just a bit before the boy last night and got ready for the gym, we played some raqetteball and then headed home to get ready for the night with the Steamy Bohemians at the Jerkus Circus. They was a middle aged belly dancer this time which sort of scared me and there was a comedian from Attleboro that was just plain generic. But over all we had a good time. Eating a world famous Ralph’s Burger , had one to many drinks ( I know remember why I never drink anymore it is just about 10am and I am just peeling myself out of bed, ont he computer with my hairdo from last night sticking up in the air) OH yeah I have decided with short hair there is no way to look cute when you wake up. Unless of course you have my boyfriend who thinks it looks friggen hot all tassled in the am hours. Ms. Jen meet up with us last night, she is kid free and husband free because he is in Cali at ComCon playing with stuffed animals and action figures. She had mentioned for me to come over today and play in the art studio but I have not heard from her yet… I need to go there because she made me a bag and I think she is using that for bait for me to go over, what she doesn’t know is I would love to go play in the art studio…
anywho here I am 10am and needing 15 aleve and some more water…..GURRRRR

So the last week has been a hodgepodge of fun. Last week after getting settled back into the routine and off vacation mode. Yes on Vacation I still have vacation mode… Go figure. I have 3 more weeks before I am back to work and I loath this much time to myself. Sometimes I over think, sometimes I want to write people I shouldn’t and tell them what I think of there two homes and shitty parenting. Sometimes I want to sit in front of a movie, cry, eat bon bons and read Halaquin novels. But I don’t, I drive and waste gas, I plan parties, I clean the house and then find more to clean when I am done to the point of annoying.
So last week a day of shopping and chatting with Beth was in much need and was nice, I miss my friends when life gets in the way. Thursday I went to Connecticut and hung out with the mamma dukes for a bit, was nice we never hang out alone anymore, my mom is a pretty friggen cool women and then Friday went to RI to the Beach with Mandy. Friday was the start of way to much friggen sun for crystal in the last couple days… To much 90plus days and to much direct sunlight. Saturday Neil and I had our yard sale we made about $50 bucks each and decided we would see if anyone was selling tickets to the Nextel Races on Sunday in NH. We found a guy selling them for 60 dollars a piece and decided that was a good way to spend a Sunday.
We left for NH at 6am that way to beat the traffic, in that part of NH the roads are not built to handle the 100k people that make there was 2 weekends as year to see there favorite driver try to take 1st. Well my favorite driver took 9th yesterday and Neil’s, (well we will not even go there) It was a sunny hot day and was a lot of fun, Neil made some friends with you typical Nascar fan, beer bellied, no shirt, tattooed male, who was more than happy to ring water onto Neil’s back, slighty homoerotic I think .
We got home at almost 9pm last night needing to relax and eat some yummy Chinese food. Neil joined me in the night time sleepy pill ritual that I partake in each and every night…He must have wanting to relax.
But here I am Monday- ran to Target, straightened out the house and sitting in front of the computer…Lazy, Hazy Day at 98 degrees I am staying inside…

So as a bad girl I never did write about the 4 days on the island. Neil’s parents were more then generous with there vacation time and invited us to come crash it. They vacation in Feburary and then again in the summer. We took the floor space and an aero bed that was tucked into the closet . We arrived on Friday the 7th on the 2:30pm Ferry. His parents of course were at the beach and we waited a little while for them to make it across the island to us . We settled in, ate some yummy food on the grill and relaxed. Saturday I wanted to see what was Marth’s Vineyard, funny how I have been so many places in my life but never there. Maybe growing up poor made it so the cost of a hotel room was out of reach.
We dropped his folks off at the beach and headed to Oaks Bluff and Vineyard Haven. I of course shopped, cause that is what I do best. Contemplated a Vera Bradley bag, see along with crocs and flipped up collars the New England prep look has never been for me. But there is one print of her bags that I have fallen in love with and will not stop until I allow myself to purchase one.
So we ventured around the farmers market in W Tisbury and checked up Mad Martha’s Ice Cream and so many other cute, very Island shops and so on.
That evening we had a bite to eat then Neil and I decided we would head to Oak Bluffs for the NIGHT LIFE. Funny how I would have been perfectly ok with a cocktail and relaxing on the deck. But we went to Nancy’s and had some yummy frozen drinks. Mine was a raspberry Pancake cocktail…Yummies. That night was more us being like silly teenagers and staring into each others eyes and being all cute. That is what we do best. We decided we would head back still rather early because we were going to rent Kayaks on Sunday and had the whole day planned.
Sunday was the Kayaking day. I think I am brave, I think I am smart and both of them proved to be wrong!!!! Stupid is more like it..
We took the kayaks first around Lagoon Pond in Vineyard Haven in the am while Neil’s parents went to breakfast and enjoyed the Sailboat regatta. Then we loaded the kayaks on top of the jeep and where off. I was feeling bad because his mom was so calm when her jeep with less then 30k miles on it was covered with beach sand and two kayaks. But seems they found amusement in the kayaks being on the Jeep and took some pics, saying ” there will never be kayaks on top of this vehicle again” We all went back to the house to get ready for the warm loveliness of the day. Neil and I were doing some sea kayaking and they were off to sunbath. We took the kayaks out about 3 miles always staying close to the shore and stopping on a small private beach to rest up, the waves were not huge at this point because the wind was at our backs and we were in vineyard sound. We had brought the GPS after I was thinking hell from the ocean everything looks the same. We needed to find our way back… Then Neil yells over to me ” this says the clossest waypoint is the cache we were looking for yesterday.
See we had went on a hike to Prospect Hill looking for a cache that we downloaded offline. We were thrown off and the coordinates that we had never go us to where we needed to be. The cache was located on the beach…We had given up the day before because of time contrants and large amounts of poison ivy blocking our way. So now we are in the water and the cache is showing some .52 of a mile away. We say fuck it and go for it. We land upon the rocky shore of the park and the death beach for everything from skates to lobsters nets and clams…Hum we even saw a dead seagull. But we found the cache and in the cache was a travel bug that we will put in a cache somewhere in Maine or NH. We should have used it yesterday near the raceway.
So to make a long story short we had to paddle back to where we started. All fine and dandy except I had the brilliant idea that ” if the shortest distance between two points is a straight line” then screw the shore line and paddle straight across. What this did was put us in the middle of the ocean with waves and the wind blowing against us. Needless to say I was not happy and my sea water covered glasses made for a very long 3 miles back. That night I crashed, I was very much tired.
We decided that by kayaking in the ocean waters for 8 miles the day before we were entitled to a day of sand napping. We dropped the folks off at the beach and went back to Lobsterville Beach, the reason it is called this we learned shortly after jumping in the cold water. There was millions, wait wait Trillions of baby lobsters and shrimp at this beach….Ahhhhhhh
We headed back from the beach and got showered and changed. Cooking up the lamb we bought at the farmers market with some goat cheese and the loaf of bread from the market..
That night we gathered our things and caught a 8pm ferry back home………One day to ourselves before the boy had to go back to work…..wahhhhh wahhhhhhh

5 Days since I have even entered a picture on this page.
Yet so much has happened.
I could sit here for 3 hours and write every detail of the Martha’s Vineyard trip, day trips to the Beach with Mandy, The yard sale or Our Nascar Sunday NH trip…
But maybe some highlights then I am at where I am currently.
Today is Monday I always write on Mondays….no need to stop now
Sitting here did the e-vites for the Shindig that Neil and I are having next weekend. Cocktails, Tapas , music and chat. Crystal has been going thru some hostessing withdrawal as of late. So I have been telling Neil that we need to throw a get together, one with Crystal’s Amazing Sangria and Homemade healthy for you Crab Cheese Wontons…
So far I have Beth& Mike, Joannah and Her hubby, Jen ( not sure if she is bringing Chris). Neil is to ask a few of his Old Skool friends…..Can’t wait to go to work on this.
Saw some very cute glasses today at Target that I will pick up for the cocktails and started looking for ideas for the food. Maybe I can talk Jen into making her very yummy cucumber sandwiches….ummmmmmmmm.
But I have 4 more days of inviting and preparing….Can’t wait

Just got back from my trip to MV with the boy and this pic I took on the Ferry back to the cape.
To me the ocean is Summer, the Sunsets are very summer in this part of the country.

Wow I am a slacker you would think that with me not writing much in the last week that I was out and about having fun and so on. But summer is off to a slow start at least tomorrow I can get on a ferry to Martha’s Vineyard and have 4-5 days of much much fun.
It is Thursday and my week has been all about cleaning, organizing and shopping. Don’t dare enter the Solomon Pond Mall, for you will be overtaken with the huge amounts of 75% off sales.
Sad as it is with Filenes in it’s final month before it is 100% Macy’s they have my favorite clothing line on 75% off…. Which sucks because that means Macy’s will be carrying INC. clothing instead….ohs wellll
So two shirts that were originally around 50$ I just snagged for 12 bucks a piece…
See this is what my summer will become ….Shopping or at least reporting on the cheapest markdowns in history of the metro west of Massachusetts.
Everyone is jealous of my time off, but seriously I need to get crafty…I walked around Michaels yesterday in hope of striking an inspiration key in my mind and to no avail…
So I sit here and I have watched today ” Must Love Dogs” and the rest of “54″ went to EMS and then the mall, bought some odd 13 pairs of underwear and 2 shirts…and a cute little skirt at American Eagle..
Oh the greatest part was today I decided I am officially a smaller clothing size, not sure who out there has lost any drastic amount of weight but I will tell ya….When you can go into any store pick up a pair of pants and they fit it is a great day…So yes I am in a normal easy to find size once more and Fat Girl stores do not sell it. So I celebrate…I will never be that way again, it is funny I gained about 70 pounds in a years time back about 3 years ago and it has taken me just over 2 years to loss just over 50 of that. I am not a huge gal, see I am tall so I have always carried my weight well, that being as good as I can, people never believe my weight when I tell them and never have. At 5’8 and having the shoulders of a linebacker I can put a bit of weight on me.. But only lately I have become the girl that stares at herself in the mirror or the windows as I walk by, I am getting my body back again. I can lay down on my side and see my shrinking shapely thighs , this makes me smile to myself. Things slide over my ass to my much more defined waist line and I feel HOT for once. Been awhile.
See here is the facts from age 18 to 23 I was always the same size and weight give or take 5 pounds and then I went thro some interesting life events and between stress eating and living around a huge Mexican family I ballooned out , always telling myself that I would not allow one more dress size or 5 more pounds. It took me to leave the situation and move back to the east coast to regain control of my life and my health. I am on that road and doing pretty well, I could do much better since I still have little control over eating a huge piece of Chocolate tort or some ice cream.
But my body is coming back which makes me happy.
Just nervous with the next 5 days of me having little control over what is cooked, but the good ww leader said I have total control over how much I eat…Oh so right…

Nothing like deciding to stay inside 99% of the day with the AC turned down to 62 degree, you know why??
Because the minute you look outside and it was raining and when you step out the back door and it is all of a sudden the Three H’s Hazy, hot and Humid!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I feel like I am not part of the world, 4th of July and we are at home cooking on the grill, checking the internet, watching movies and so on….
But then again come Friday we will be getting on the ferry to Martha’s Vineyard and be part of the summer every other New Englander is experiencing…Trips, day trips, high gas usage while under high oil prices….
But for today we are in our own world….Just enjoying each other…

Happiness is time in the woods with my boy. This is at Crawford Notch, NH